It's never been so easy!

Hey!

You!

Yeah, YOU! With your poor fingers singed! Were you trying to take your freshly made toast out of the toaster with your fingers again?

Does this happen to you every time you make toast?

Have you stopped eating toast, simply because you find it too difficult to remove the hot tasty treat from it's firey hell of a prison?

WELL LOOK NO FURTHER!!

It's TOAST TONGS!!!

Now you can free that unwieldy toast, everytime! No burnt fingers, no electrocution-by-knife-removal, just pick up your toast tongs, and voila! The toast is now OUT of the toaster!

(****sidenote**** who the fuck thinks this shit up?)

A Public Service Announcement

Please don't film your chubby children singing somewhat inappropriate songs for their age group while wearing too small character pajamas (please pronounce that like you're British, thank you). But, if you ignore this request, kindly place the results on the internet for me to enjoy. Thank you for your time.

What. The. Fuck.

This is all cute and stuff. And then you get to the 40 second mark.

Holy Hell.



Also, Happy Birthday bb!

drama fail

i don't know what's better, the man proclaiming "that's not good", or the girls scream of "OMG!" when they send her flying instead of peter pan

Birthday Shenans!

In honor of Lizzie's birthday today (you'll never be as old as me, betch), I'm taking you on a tour of our Shenanigans.

First up we have....Liz finding Jesus! In the IHOP parking lot, no less.



We tried to refrigerate a pie using ice in a cardboard box. Yeah. "Oops" would be appropriate.

We like to laugh. Hard.

We buy random tourist t-shirts in Walgreens when we're super tired.

Honestly, this is probably where we should have ended up on numerous occasions, we just don't get caught. We're that good.

We've been known to desecrate signs once or twice.


The scary bird is watching you while you shop for really old crap.



Once, we tried to kill a whole family of prairie dogs. I suppose it was my fault for pointing out the passenger window and shouting "LOOK!" just as we went around a giant curve in the road. My bad.

We tend to find the most ridiculous things in the most ridiculous places. WHY is there a giant sombrero with "MEXICO" embroidered on it poorly in an "old west saloon", you ask? We don't know either. Olé!

Believe it or not, she made it the whole 8 seconds.


HAPPY BIRTHDAY LIZZIE!

I miss you like a crack habit.